Secret Thoughts of Stuffed Animals

Lumbago

2010-07-31T22:49:00.001-05:00

On occasion, I am reminded that being lazy takes a toll. That, and getting old.

I mowed the lawn today, front and back. broke out the weed trimmer, then got down on my knees and ripped out all the shot growing along the stone wall.

It looks nice now, but my back hurts. Stupid growing old.

Tales from the Crypt

2010-07-29T20:41:00.002-05:00

Gray cloth caskets are cheap. When I say cheap, I mean really, really cheap. Fiberboard covered with gray cloth, the inside stuffed with straw. But if you can't afford a decent burial, or the departed is headed for the retort, it can seem like a smart choice.

I spent a couple of years working at a funeral home that did a lot of business. On average, about 400-500 calls a year. We had a nice casket display room downstairs, with several versions of the mid and high range caskets on hand. The gray cloth we had one, and then several back ups in a warehouse a few miles away.

So, one day we're burying a rather heavy gentleman in a gray cloth. The morning of the funeral, the mourners came to the funeral home to pay their last respects. After a final viewing, we ushered them out to their cars to await the hearse and the ride to the church. Once everyone was out of the funeral home and in their cars, we closed up the casket and went to move it on to the church truck. Four of us grabbed the casket, one at each corner. We lifted, and the casket rose. All except for the bottom and the corpse.

Not good. Worse, we didn't have another gray cloth on hand. As the unknowing family and friends sat idling in their cars, waiting to proceed to the church, me and one of the other guys jumped in a van and sped off to the warehouse to grab a replacement.

All that is bad enough. But it gets better. We get to the warehouse, which is a garage for the hearses. There's a second floor where the caskets are kept. Thankfully, the hearses were not there. But we had to run up stairs, throw straps around a casket and use a hoist to lower it down to the ground floor. Then, load it in to the van and race back to the funeral home.

We got back, put the casket on the church truck, and lifted the body in. Thankfully, the second casket did not give out during the service. The family was never the wiser.

Sticky Keys

2010-06-03T20:40:00.002-05:00

So, the other day the FM transmitter I use to listen to my iPod in the car crapped out on me. I've been listening to NPR during my commute.
Yesterday they had a bit about how the interwebs are re-wiring our brains. The plus is people are getting better at multi-tasking. The negative is we're moving away from more contemplative modes of thinking.

Which caused me to contemplate that I haven't blogged in a while. A long while. Been too busy with FB and tweeting and absorbing vast amounts of useless information for short periods of time.

At the same time, I've been going through some rather significant changes in the direction of my life. I've been giving a lot of thought to the direction I'm headed in, and how to best answer my calling to service. Still haven't figured it out yet, but I'm starting to get involved. Starting to grow up.

It's a strange feeling.

Halloween 09

2009-10-25T18:59:00.001-05:00

The curse of microblogging

2009-09-22T07:47:00.002-05:00

Oh, it's been a while since I posted here. Thanks to Facebook and Twitter, I often don't take the time to jot down a thought that's more than a sentence or two long. Sigh.

So, news. TKJr joined the local cub scout troop. So did I. I'm now a den leader. Hopefully this will help me grow as both a parent and adult. It's overdue.

Smell My Picture

2009-06-19T20:37:00.003-05:00

So, a few weeks ago I hooked up with a professional photographer to get some quality pictures of me in my home made Residents costume. Bill Hicks, the photog, does wedding photography and is looking to expand into costumed portraits. I got some awesome free shots, he got some stuff for his portfolio.

Great guy, and he did a fantastic job. You can check him out here. Here's a few samples:

RIP Bob Bogle

2009-06-17T19:19:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday, Bluebird

2009-04-24T08:25:00.001-05:00

My little girl turns 3 today. Time goes by fast with these little ones. Seems like just yesterday I carried her in the crook of my arm.

Happy b-day, Izzy.

Toy of the week

2009-04-19T20:23:00.002-05:00

Stripe, from Gremlins. My sister had Gizmo, but I of course preferred his counterpart.

You've been warned!

2009-03-18T19:46:00.003-05:00

Found via flikr

You know your life is pretty sad when...

2009-03-13T22:51:00.002-05:00

... you're psyched that you made it through an entire day at work wearing a T shirt with bowel movements all over it.

I said "HA HA!"

No compromise

2009-03-07T23:13:00.002-05:00

So, KG and I just got home from seeing Watchmen.

Well done, Mr. Snyder. Yeah, there was stuff missing. Yeah, some things were changed. But I really don't think we could have gotten a better movie than this. I'm very pleased.

I'm sure I'll have more to say at a later date. For no, suffice to say I give it a big thumbs up.

Nuke it!

2009-02-26T08:49:00.001-05:00

Just for shits and giggles. You can input any location or address, choose your weapon, and see what kind of mayhem is unleashed.

Good, clean fun.

Rorschach

2009-02-24T21:34:00.001-05:00

I made this a few years back. Just curious what people might see when they look at:

Oh yeah, the blog...

2009-02-23T21:28:00.005-05:00

I, like a few others I know, have been sucked into the cult of facebook. Though I don't blog much over there, I do waste a lot of time "socializing."

In addition, we purchased a scanner this weekend, so my squirrel of the week is scanning old family photos. Good times.

With the exception of the wonderful folks goggling "fucking stuffed animals" and "chocatas", most readers here see me over there. So, in the spirit of a real update, here's a few exclusive pictures:

Note the totally awesome Genesis poster behind me
Going postal at the tender age of 2.

Sweet Jesus Noooo!

2009-02-11T20:29:00.003-05:00

The following sneak peak at Cobra Commander from the new GI JOE movie leaked today. Not that I was expecting anything but shit, but seriously:

My reaction can be summed up with the following clip:

Nuff said

Being vigilant isn't a crime

2009-02-05T20:31:00.001-05:00

What don't you fucking understand?

2009-02-03T20:33:00.000-05:00

While I'm not usually a fan of remixes, this rocks:

A little self mockery goes a long way

2009-02-02T18:39:00.002-05:00

My brother in law is partly responsible for this commercial. Good job, JT.

Sexism in my cereal bowl?

2009-01-27T20:49:00.002-05:00

It's no secret to those that know me that I am passionate about my breakfast cereals. For dinner tonight, I had a heaping bowl of Cap'n Crunch (Note: I have not eaten my favorite, Crunch Berries, since they introduced the multicolored balls. All red or none at all for me!). I've often expounded at length on both my love for cereals, and my sadness at the passing of my favorite brands.

That said, it never occurred to me that there is not one female breakfast cereal mascot. It's all franks and beans.

Sure, there has been the occasional female product placement (Rainbow Brite, Strawberry Shortcake). But every cartoon spokesman is just that, a man. Or male. Even Pebbles, named after a female character, is represented by Fred and Barney.

What's up with that?

2009-01-19T21:06:00.001-05:00

more animals

Growing up Star Wars

2009-01-13T22:17:00.001-05:00

I stumbled across this slide show via The Force.net.

Wow. That was my childhood.

Did ya ever?

2009-01-12T21:40:00.003-05:00

Just have one of those days turning into a week of not really giving a good god damn about anything? It's looking like one of those weeks for me.

Sometimes life is just uninspiring drudgery.

I'm sure I'll feel a little better come Friday when BSG returns. For now, the whole world just gets a big old "meh."

Fuck NTB

2009-01-04T20:29:00.002-05:00

I brought KG's car into National Tire and battery today to replace her two front tires. $107 all told, and they managed to get me out of there fairly quickly. About what I was expecting, so no complaints there.

What raises my ire, though, is the petty theft. Of approximately $1.00 in change from the center console. I noted when I dropped the car off that KG had some silver in the little coin holder. It was gone when I left.

A few years ago, I brought my car in for a new battery and tires. I had about $10 in quarters in the bin. I knew this because I had counted it that morning, considering using it to buy a pack of smokes. When I went out to my car after having it serviced, the change was gone.

I went back in and confronted the sales guy. Of course, the mechanic denied it. I told him I wasn't concerned about the loss of $10, it was the principle. I'd just spent a couple of hundred in their store, and the mechanic must have realized the coinage would be missed.

Needless to say, the money was not returned. They did give me a voucher for a free oil change, though.

So, here we are a few years later. The amount taken was probably less than a buck, but the principle remains the same. Seriously, what the fuck, guys?

I will never be going to NTB again, and I'll do my best to discourage others from going. I hope that spare change got you something good out of the sundry machine, you fucking grease monkey.

Belnaphi

2009-01-03T00:03:00.002-05:00

On the first day of '09, I gave my love a face full of champagne.

On the second day of '09, I left my love in the lurch with 2 kids and a flat tire on a work day.

On the cusp of the third day of '09, I had one of those moments of clarity.

I'll do my best to not allow it to be obscured.

When you lose sight of your path, your environment tends to step in and remind you. I'll be mindful.

Year's end meme

2008-12-31T23:48:00.002-05:00

A look back at 2008 via the first words I posted each month:

January: The first day of the new year... woke up hung over and irritable.

February: I found myself in work this morning before the sun had even come up. That's just wrong.

March: HESS truck! It lights up, and that's about it.

April: Well, our new found Irish friend completed the restoration of our stone wall today.

May: RIP Albert Hofmann.

June: In the normal course of a day, I send roughly 20 some emails to various people asking them to complete, correct or re-do work. That's my job.

July: In order to help fill the state coffers, Massachusetts just put into effect an additional $1 per pack cigarette tax.

August: Sorry, guys. I have no information about Wall E stuffed animals. If there are any, I'd like one.

September: Got my copy of The Bunny Boy today.

October: Needless to say, I can not wait!

November: Well, the trick or treating was light, but over all it was a fun day.

December: You may now refer to me as Rev. TK8103.

Thanks to Mycalls for the idea. Here's hoping 2009 is a decent year, filled with happiness, prosperity, and more inane drivel from yours truly.

And my apologies to KG for dumping champagne all over her.

FOX sucks ass

2008-12-29T21:10:00.003-05:00

Nuff said.

In other suckage, today was a shit-tastic day. Came back to work after a nice 5 day weekend to find a mountain of work waiting for me. Closing is a week away, and I haven't even looked at the error report. Got handed a retro fee change. Got an email from the boss saying my eval will be tomorrow, and we need to discuss my apparent abuse of sick time and something about "inappropriate communications."

As I settled into to start doing some work, the power went out in my cube. Just my cube. Seems some jumper wire burned out. Then Horizons shit the bed.

Missed lunch with the gang as they tried to resolve the Horizon issue. Got a phone call that the roofers tripped a circuit breaker in the house, had to call my parents and ask them to go reset it. Finally, i was reminded that I'm covering referrals for the MCH team on Wed and Fri.

Fuck me. On the bright side, tomorrow is a new day. Woohoo.

Merry Christmas to all

2008-12-24T21:35:00.001-05:00

Happy Brumalia!

Happy Festivus!

2008-12-23T23:10:00.001-05:00

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

The Ironing is delicious

2008-12-23T13:10:00.001-05:00

From Cake Wrecks:

Another perspective

2008-12-21T20:58:00.002-05:00

Here are a couple of before and after shots of the back yard, just to give you an idea of how much snow we got:

I shoveled a total of 4 times, and right now the driveway, walkway and cars are covered in ice. The plow has left yet another bank of snow behind the cars. I've had enough.

Let it snow

2008-12-20T11:59:00.001-05:00

Here's our driveway at 2:15PM yesterday:
4:15PM:
6:15PM
8:15PM
9:00AM this morning

On the way to Oklahoma...

2008-12-19T13:03:00.000-05:00

Or, as I like to say: Batshit crazy.

The Piano has been drinking

2008-12-15T22:48:00.000-05:00

The piano has been drinking
my necktie is asleep
and the combo went back to New York
the jukebox has to take a leak
and the carpet needs a haircut
and the spotlight looks like a prison break
cause the telephone's out of cigarettes
and the balcony's on the make
and the piano has been drinking
the piano has been drinking...

and the menus are all freezing
and the lightman's blind in one eye
and he can't see out of the other
and the piano-tuner's got a hearing aid
and he showed up with his mother
and the piano has been drinking
the piano has been drinking

cause the bouncer is a Sumo wrestler
cream puff casper milk toast
and the owner is a mental midget
with the I.Q. of a fencepost
cause the piano has been drinking
the piano has been drinking...

and you can't find your waitress
with a Geiger counter
And she hates you and your friends
and you just can't get served
without her
and the box-office is drooling
and the bar stools are on fire
and the newspapers were fooling
and the ash-trays have retired
the piano has been drinking
the piano has been drinking
The piano has been drinking
not me, not me, not me, not me, not me

Tom Waits

Workplace fail

2008-12-10T14:01:00.002-05:00

Pic courtesy of the mighty Molius

We gots snow

2008-12-07T21:38:00.002-05:00

Transcendence through Failure

2008-12-06T00:09:00.003-05:00

You may now refer to me as Rev. TK8103.
Today I became an ordained minister. According to the Universal Life Church Monastery:

Let it be known on this date that in accordance with the laws of the Universal Life Church Monastery, as ordaining officer, I, Brother Martin, do ordain you into our ministry. From this day forward, you are entitled to all of the rights of an ordained minister. You have the authority to perform marriages, baptisms, and all other ceremonies of the church. You are an independent minister of this church. This is a position that carries with it a burden of responsibility; please respect others and comply with the laws of the land.

I'm not sure yet how far I'll be taking this, but I am giving some thought to actually ministering. I've got a few ideas for a religion that actually makes sense and has some potential to enlighten. I need to flesh it out.

I'll be sure to keep you posted.

I will, however, leave you with this thought: Perhaps a perfect savior is not the best savior. It's through our transgressions that we really learn, and a divinity that suffers because of and has the potential to transcend his or her failures is a much more access able divinity.

Some grow wise, some other wise.

2008-12-04T21:00:00.001-05:00

Brockton Holiday Parade

2008-11-30T20:44:00.002-05:00

Here's a few shots from this weekend's troop. It was my first parade, so that was fun. Even better, I got to troop with Darth Chip, who I'm partly responsible for. I put the bug in his ear, at any rate.

Blast from the past

2008-11-20T20:58:00.001-05:00

I used to watch this show every day when I was a kid. Wow.

Gay Marriage

2008-11-16T20:50:00.003-05:00

I'm getting really tired of the whole "sanctity of marriage" argument. Seriously.

Marriage is, and should be, recognized as the sacred union of two people. If two individuals fall in love and vow to remain true to one another, they should be afford the legal recognition of that vow.

50% of male/female marriages end in divorce. Where's the sanctity in that?

I'm married. There were no legal, moral or social obstacles to over come for KG and I to wed. We flew to Vegas. We stood in line at City Hall, filled out a form, paid $50, and were wed at the Elvis Chapel the next day. End of story.

Anyone who takes the right away from two people in love to marry cheapens the meaning of my marriage. It only means something if it's a right afforded to every one.

So, how about we all get together and give me back my sanctity, eh?

Gooble gobble

2008-11-13T20:38:00.002-05:00

So, it's official. KG was offered, and accepted, a position working for my company. In 2 weeks she will become the accounting coordinator at our Wellesley affiliate.

She's pretty happy. She's finally escaped Bif-dis, she'll be working 30 hours a week, and she's getting the same hourly rate. Of course, she's in for a tougher commute, but who doesn't have one these days.

I'm excited. Seinfeld jokes aside ("Worlds are colliding, Jerry!"), it'll be nice to have her working for the company. I enjoy my job there, and I'm sure she will as well.

That is all.

Veteran's Day

2008-11-11T09:07:00.001-05:00

I got your letter today
And I miss you all so much, here
I can't wait to see you all
And I'm counting the days, dear
I still believe that there's gold
At the end of the world
And I'll come home
To Illinois
On the day after tomorrow

It is so hard
And it's cold here
And I'm tired of taking orders
And I miss old Rockford town
Up by the Wisconsin border
But I miss you won't believe
Shoveling snow and raking leaves
And my plane will touch tomorrow
On the day after tomorrow

I close my eyes
Every night
And I dream that I can hold you
They fill us full of lies
Everyone buys
About what it means to be a soldier
I still don't know how I'm supposed to feel
About all the blood that's been spilled
Look out on the street
Get me back home
On the day after tomorrow

You can't deny
The other side
Don't want to die
Any more than we do
What I'm trying to say,
Is don't they pray
To the same God that we do?
Tell me, how does God choose?
Whose prayers does he refuse?
Who turns the wheel?
And who throws the dice
On the day after tomorrow?

Mmmmmmm...
I'm not fighting
For justice
I am not fighting
For freedom
I am fighting
For my life
And another day
In the world here
I just do what I've been told
You're just the gravel on the road
And the one's that are lucky
One's come home
On the day after tomorrow

And the summer
It too will fade
And with it comes the winter's frost, dear
And I know we too are made
Of all the things that we have lost here
I'll be twenty-one today
I've been saving all my pay
And my plane will touch down
On the day after tomorrow
And my plane it will touch down
On the day after tomorrow

-Tom Waits "The Day After Tomorrow"

Mix Tape!

2008-11-06T22:25:00.000-05:00

Waka-waka

2008-11-06T20:54:00.002-05:00

Which Classic Arcade Game Are You?

WTF?

2008-11-05T20:43:00.001-05:00

Shame on the major media outlets for not picking up on this story. From io9:

For the past few days, university students in the Southern Chinese resort town of Hainan have been quarantined on the grounds of the Hainan University campus with little food or water. Apparently there's been an outbreak of cholera, and the local officials dealt with it Resident Evil style: Lock everybody in, give them no information, and see if they survive. But one woman student has been blogging about the ongoing ordeal, posting pictures and giving status updates several times a day.

Here's a link to the translated blog: Life in the time of cholera.

For those that may scoff at my less than mild obsession with a zombie apocalypse, remember this. In the event of a major outbreak of any sort, you and I and everyone we love are fucked.

Seriously.

Happy Guy Fawkes Day

2008-11-05T11:07:00.002-05:00

"Remember, remember the fifth of November,

The gunpowder, treason and plot,

I know of no reason

Why the gunpowder treason

Should ever be forgot.”

"

A penny loaf to feed the Pope

A farthing o' cheese to choke him.

A pint of beer to rinse it down.

A fagot of sticks to burn him.

Burn him in a tub of tar.

Burn him like a blazing star.

Burn his body from his head.

Then we'll say ol' Pope is dead.

Hip hip hoorah!

Hip hip hoorah hoorah!"

Chip of the old block

2008-11-04T21:12:00.003-05:00

Every day my little boy starts to look more and more like me:

In election news, it looks like level heads are prevailing in MA as far as Question 1 goes. As of right now, it looks like Question 2 will pass. Woohoo!
It's still too early to call the grand pooh bear race, but the map is looking very blue right now.
Despite my earlier anti-voting stance, I stopped on the way home and did my thing.
Hope springs eternal.

Fuck the Vote

2008-11-04T08:50:00.001-05:00

“The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election”

Happy Halloween!

2008-11-01T19:51:00.002-05:00

Well, the trick or treating was light, but over all it was a fun day.
Here's me at work with my biggest fan:
The whole family:
And me posing with my effigy:

Trick or Treat!

2008-10-29T19:27:00.002-05:00

Chores

2008-10-29T19:24:00.000-05:00

In order to teach TKJr some responsibility and allow him to earn a small allowance, KG came up with a list of chores for him to do after school. Before he can have a snack or watch TV, he has to do the following:

1. Shake sand out of his shoes and put them away.
2. Take lunch box out of backpack, put dirty sandwich box in sink, put lunch box and backpack in green bin.
3. Pick up toys from living room floor and put away in brown boxes.
4. Wash hands with soap and water.

She made up a poster with the list and hung it in the kitchen. TKJr liked it, and so far has been good about doing them. Shortly after KG explained the list to him and hung it up, I found him at the table, busily working with a marker and a piece of paper. At the top of the paper he had written "Mom and Dad", and down the side were the numbers 1-9. I asked him what he was doing, and he told me he was making a chore list for us. He then dictated the following list to me. I wrote it down verbatim, and it is now hanging in the kitchen along with his chore list. I think #8 is my favorite.

1. Eat snacks that are healthy, don't eat spicy ones.
2. Tickle TKJr when he's silly.
3. Take good care of the cat.
4. Never, ever spank Mommy.
5. Put your jammies on quick before midnight.
6. Be an early bird, just like TKJr.
7. Don't blow bubbles with bugs flying in them.
8. If there's a fire in your room, call the fire fighters but please don't run out of town.
9. Always wash dishes when you see little dirt spots on them.

My day off

2008-10-28T20:26:00.003-05:00

I finished my eyeball mask:

And the stove has been installed. The building inspector has to sign off on it before we can use it, but it's in:

Scary toys and proof of Claus

2008-10-28T08:57:00.002-05:00

Way back in 1980 I just had to have the most awesome, 18" action figure ever made: Alien

What kid wouldn't want such an incredible, nightmare inducing hunk of plastic? I honestly don't know what the folks at Kenner were thinking when they came up with this. A tie in for a R rated horror movie. At any rate, being a monster and sci-fi buff, I wanted it.

My mother, of course, said no way. Being 7, I decided to ask Santa for it, since my mother wouldn't even entertain the idea. I wasn't holding out much hope, since she said she was telling Santa not to get it.

Christmas morning rolled around, and Santa left the usual pile of booty. One of the last presents I opened was a big box, and as the paper peeled away I saw that monster's eyes peering out at me. I exclaimed in joy "Santa got me the Alien!!!"

My mother acted all pissed. "Damn it, I told Santa not to get that for you!"

I remember going back to school, convinced Santa must be real if he went against my parents' wishes and got me the toy I wanted most.

I still have it to this day:

Children shouldn't play with guns. Period.

2008-10-27T19:21:00.003-05:00

This past weekend, an 8 year old boy in Westfield, MA blew a hole through his own head while firing a fully automatic Uzi. This was not one of those all too common cases of an irresponsible parent leaving a loaded gun within reach of an unattended child. No, little Christopher was at a "Machine gun shoot and firearms expo." According to the flyer for this event, "It’s all legal & fun. You will be accompanied to the firing line with a Certified Instructor to guide you. But You Are In Control – "FULL AUTO ROCK & ROLL."

Holy jumping Jesus, fuck me sideways.

Now I'm no bleeding heart liberal, and I'm not anti-gun. I believe Americans do have a right to bear arms. I believe in responsible, legal ownership of firearms. If said owner has children, I believe in educating those children concerning gun safety. I even support taking said children to a firing range where they can learn first hand how to operate a fire arm.

But who, in their right mind, would conceive of a "machine gun shoot" for children? Seriously, what the fuck? It boggles my mind that such an event would be allowed to occur in the first place. There is no good reason, NO GOOD REASON why a child should be around or handling a fully automatic assault weapon. EVER.

Guns are not bad. They provide protection. They can be used to hunt. Target practice is a fine hobby. But an assault rifle is for just that: assault. It's only purpose is to kill and maim human beings. Quickly. The words assault and children should not go together. EVER.

Of course a young boy would jump at the chance to handle such a weapon. Boys are trained from the get go that they're cool. That does not mean it should be encouraged. Sweet bleeding Mary, what are people thinking? I seriously can not wrap my head around it.

I really shouldn't be surprised that the devolution of Western society has reached this point. Just the other night I was expressing concern over some of the new toys coming from the good folks at NERF. I'm not trying to be an alarmist here, and I don't think I'm being over sensitive when I say there is something inherently wrong with marketing a foam projectile assault weapon to children. For Christ sake, watch this video for the N-Strike and tell me there isn't something wrong there.

Of course it's wicked fucking cool, and if it had been around when I was a lad, I would have wanted one. But I really think we're crossing a line here, and we need to stop. As NERF guns get more and more extreme, shoot longer distances, shoot faster, it's really only a short progression to making one that will actually maim. Perhaps that's a leap, but the other issue here is training young children to be soldiers.

That ain't right, yo.

Eye'm almost done

2008-10-26T19:12:00.002-05:00

The veins are hardening as I type. Tomorrow I'll paint them up and glue them on.

More Halloween goodness

2008-10-25T14:29:00.004-05:00

Here are a few more shots of our holiday preparations.

My little front yard cemetery:
Our skel-o-flamingos:
My eyeball with the pupil in place:
I'm getting the iris painted on by a local airbrush artist tomorrow. Almost done!

Fan boy weigh-in

2008-10-24T22:25:00.002-05:00

I've been remiss.

Halloween, a wood stove, children et all have distracted me from taking a moment or two to voice up about both Indy 4 and The Clone Wars.

I admit, I went to see TCW premiere more than a little jaded from all the reviews. My mind was not as open as it could have been. That said, I didn't hate it. I found it enjoyable, only slightly annoying at parts, but over all satisfactory and entertaining. The battle sequences were impressive. So I went into watching the series looking for nothing more than a weekly dose of Star Wars. No matter how far removed from ANH.

Well, let me say this: Holy shit. I've been enjoying the hell out of the series. All the episodes have surpassed any expectations or hopes I might have had. The stories are interesting, the animation looks good, and there are enough allusions to all the best qualities of the original trilogy to keep me very happy. Even the stiffness of the human characters is OK by me. I believe it is intentional, as it evokes memories of Thunderbirds. Nothing wrong with a touch of Supermarionation.

They've been exploring aspects of the story between episodes 2 and 3 that interest me. The development of the clones and their relationship with the Jedi. The galactic scope of the war. The evolution of the Imperial aesthetic and architecture. New droids. Those commando droids are pretty sweet, and make sense.

Tonight's episode ended on a really cool and vaguely personal note. The rookie clones were inducted into the most elite of trooper squadrons: the 501st. TK8103, for one, says thank you for the shout out. Super fuckin cool.

So, Indy IV I watched the other night. I didn't hate it. In fact, I rather enjoyed it. It did evoke for me nostalgia for the franchise. Indy was still one cool cat. I liked the limited use of CGI, and the overblown story line was fun. Listen, seriously... there's nothing more far fetched about inter dimensional beings than there is about a mystical Hebrew relic that makes people's faces melt. It was executed well, if not a little heavy handed.

I for one want to thank Uncle George and Uncle Steve for allowing us to continue to play in their sandbox. Sure, they might be trying to steer that box toward a younger generation that they're slightly out of touch with. That's they're duty. Regardless, it's still fun. I'll rate Crystal Skull #3, after Raiders and Last Crusade.

As for The Clone Wars... it's the bomb. Keep up the good work, and you can really go somewhere good with it. I look forward to the journey.

Now, if we could all just band together and do something about JOE.

Eyeball Progress

2008-10-20T20:07:00.003-05:00

I'm on the home stretch with the construction of my Residents costume. Here you can see the hard hat glued inside the globe:
Perfect fit!
Now to drill holes for bolts to hold the hat, paint it up, add a screen for the iris and some veins.

Touch a Truck

2008-10-19T19:53:00.003-05:00

I spent the better part of my Sunday freezing my ass off dressed in white armor. There was a "Touch a Truck" fund raiser in Weymouth, and I was the lone trooper. Here are a few of my favorite shots:

TK8103, meet T&K
"I don't want stormtrooper Daddy!"
The two faces of Homeland Security
Posing with the ladies
Yeah, I'm cool

Halloween is getting closer...

2008-10-16T19:37:00.002-05:00

Only a couple of weeks until Halloween. Here's a peak at our front yard decorations this year:

And a sneak peak at my costume in progress:

I had a fever dream

2008-10-12T21:58:00.002-05:00

Just got in from The Bunny Boy show. All I can say is.... wow.

I was standing maybe 10 ft from the band the whole show. An incredible show. I'll post more about it later. For now, I'm still trying to process it all.

What is and should not be

2008-10-07T10:03:00.003-05:00

So, yesterday I get home from work and my stepfather says to me "I want to tell you something before your wife gets home."

OK.

He's out of work right now, and apparently has plenty of time to kill during the day. It seems many years ago he purchased the "5 Gates of Hell." He had never worked up the nerve to actually try it on. Until yesterday.

Now, mind you, he's relating this story to me as I'm standing in the kitchen, ice coffee in hand and my children playing in the next room. He manged to force his junk through the rings, and soon discovered it wasn't going to be easy removing them. He was nice enough to tell me he had shaved earlier that morning, so at least his pubes weren't getting caught.

He did manage to get the thing removed in time to pick up my son from preschool, and without a trip to the ER.

So, after he related this misadventure and went home to my dear mother, I had to ask myself: Was I more disturbed that he owns this contraption and decided to play with it (at 60), or by the fact that he so casually decides to relate this tale to me?

The horror, the horror.

Dude, there are just some things you don't share with your children. THIS IS ONE OF THEM!!!!

One week to go...

2008-10-05T11:02:00.001-05:00

Needless to say, I can not wait!

Ninja Cat

2008-09-26T22:19:00.000-05:00

It's a slow burn at first, but well worth it

Turn, turn

2008-09-19T20:38:00.002-05:00

Well, it would appear summer has left New England. granted, the leaves haven't gotten serious about changing yet, but there's a chill in the air and it's getting dark earlier.

I like fall. It's my favorite time of year. I love the crisp, clear air. The smell of leaves on the ground. Dressing in layers. Halloween. I'm not a fan of what fall leads to, but that's the cycle of life.

What I don't like is how expensive living is going to get. Dropping $3K on a wood burning stove. Another $400-500 a month to keep the house heated. Snow. These things I can do without.

Day off

2008-09-17T20:37:00.002-05:00

Today I took a for-the-fuck-of-it vacation day.

Drove the boy to school, window shopped for wood burning stoves, split 2 cords of wood, worked on my Halloween costume, did some laundry, watched some TV.

That was it, and it was great.

RIP, Richard Wright

2008-09-15T20:47:00.002-05:00

I remarked today that one of the things that sucks about having mature taste in music is that you have to watch the greats pass on, one after the other.

And no one sings me lullabyes
And no one makes me close my eyes
So I throw the windows wide
And call to you across the sky....

Happy 9/11 Day!

2008-09-11T20:33:00.003-05:00

Seven years ago today things changed slightly here in the US of A. Namely, airplanes stopped flying for a couple of days, any pretense of personal liberties was pissed away, The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson was unfairly yanked from the airwaves, and the news crawl became a permanent fixture on CNN.

Seven years on, the country as a whole has still failed at passing through the Kubler-Ross model. We're not anywhere near acceptance. Not when the footage in Cloverfield is considered too soon. Not when a city can crawl to a stand still over Lite-Brites. Not when W still holds office. Not when you can't wear your shoes to pass through airport security.

Come on, folks, seriously. We'll never forget, I swear. We won't. It's a defining moment for the 21st century. The images of that day will forever be imprinted on our memories. But we can get past the mourning, the hand wringing, the fear mongering. We can move on.

We may never get back our pre-post 9/11 world, but we can buck up.

The wheel keeps on turning

2008-09-07T20:56:00.002-05:00

Another weekend come and gone.

Friday night M and G were otherwise occupied, so KG and I watched season one of Arrested Development. We retired early, and that was nice.

Saturday Hanna arrived. We took the kids to Edaville Railroad for a "Day Out With Thomas the Tank Engine." The kids had fun, and we managed to be there in between the worst of the downpours.

We survived what was left of the hurricane with a minimum of damage. There was some flooding in the office, which is not a good sign. I can't figure out where the water came in from, but it appears to be somewhere inside the wall. The next door neighbors lost the top of a tree, which landed on and shatter one of the panels on my picket fence. One of the new ones, of course.

Today started off with KG and I having a shouting match in the kitchen, but that resolved quickly enough. Took the kids to McD's for breakfast, and then had an open house at TKJr's kindergarten. Tonight I created yet another gift application on Facebook, and am now preparing to call it a night.

Tomoorw starts another exciting week at work. Closing for August is Thursday ( Never Forget!), so I'm sure it'll be a stressful and highly annoying week. Woohoo, I say.

It has arrived

2008-09-02T21:20:00.002-05:00

Got my copy of The Bunny Boy today. I have not had a chance to give it a good listen yet, but I am very much looking forward to my commute tomorrow morning.

I'm very interested in seeing how their planned internet series works out. For now, I'm just counting the days until October 12th.

w00t!

2008-09-02T21:00:00.001-05:00

Sometimes I just want to talk. About feelings and things. Those annoying mushy things that supposedly connect one person to another.

Is it asking too much to have a conversation about us?

I've got a story to tell

2008-09-01T20:09:00.000-05:00

Unsupportable Stupidity

2008-08-28T08:31:00.003-05:00

I was cc'd on the following email conversation this morning:

Manager: Do the clinicians need to do anything other than turning the computer on and signing in?

Help Desk: No, I have set it up such that regardless of who logs on they should be able to open Citrix, log in, and use it as desired.

Manager: Thanks very much – can someone please write up step-by-step instructions so that Extended Hours staff in need will know how to use the desktops correctly? Thanks!

Umm, excuse me?? Step by step instructions??

Step One: TURN ON THE FUCKING COMPUTER.
Step Two: USE THE FUCKING COMPUTER.

For the record, this exchange was prompted by the manager attempting to turn on a desk top PC . She pressed the power button on the monitor several times. When this failed to boot up the computer, she freaked out.

Thankfully I did not have to respond to this request. I probably would have been fired.

Figures, don't it?

2008-08-26T21:13:00.002-05:00

I called in sick to work yesterday when I was not indeed sick. I believe in the importance of the occasional mental health day, and of course I'm often called upon to stay home with a sick child.

Now, it's a little after 10, I'm tired as hell, my eyes are itching and I've been sneezing all evening. Top that off with a scratchy throat.

Guess I'm going to have to ride this out and hope it's just allergies.

Show some love for Hallmark

2008-08-24T19:31:00.003-05:00

It would appear that the good folks at Hallmark have begun selling greeting cards for same sex marriage. While this may appear to be forward thinking and inclusive, the some what less good folks at the American Family Association think differently.

They've gone to the trouble to set up a website where you can send an email to the Chairman of Hallmark expressing your disgust.

Funny thing is, you can edit the text of the email. What's to say one doesn't instead send an email of support? Eh?

Click here and turn the hate around.

[Note] You might want to just cut and paste the email address rather than using the AFA page. I got me some email from them this morning.

Little Man

2008-08-21T06:52:00.002-05:00

So, last night I experimented with the slide show maker that comes with the Nero software. It was fairly easy to use, but I must admit the constant pop ups asking if I'd like to buy the updated version were annoying.

Please excuse the varied wipes and fades. I just wanted to get a feel for how they all looked, and by the time I was done burning it I was far too tired to go back and replace them. I did manage to get in one star wipe, though. So I got that going for me. Anyway, here's a tribute to the boy:

Burn, baby, burn

2008-08-16T21:29:00.002-05:00

I took advantage of the tax free weekend to finally replace my broken CD-ROM drive. I upgraded to a Sony DVDR drive. The install was fairly painless, and everything seems to be working. I burned a quickie CD, and it sounds fine.

I also purchased a plug in to convert VHS to DVD. Hopefully tomorrow I'll get that installed, dust off the VHS deck and dig out my old home videos. I'm guessing that'll keep me out of trouble and up late for a while.

Lightening!

2008-08-13T20:03:00.001-05:00

Apparently the refrain of choice when nearly hit by lightening:

"Holy shit!"

Oh, he's not going to... arghhh!!!

2008-08-12T19:44:00.003-05:00

So, I'm driving through North Quincy today on my way to pick up my daughter. I was waiting at a red light, idly gazing around. I noticed some guy walking on the sidewalk. He didn't look homeless or crazy, just an average looking, middle aged black man. He drew my attention because he stopped short at a large rain puddle on the sidewalk. Suddenly, he got down on all fours, and to my abject horror began drinking from the puddle. DRINKING!!!! I was stunned. I jest not when I say he was lapping that shit up! I was actually too shocked to grab the camera sitting in my laptop bag.

I have no earthly idea what would cause a man to drink rain water out of a sidewalk puddle. Some sort of mental illness is surely to blame.

Just another day.

Coincidence or conspiracy? You be the judge

2008-08-11T20:26:00.003-05:00

A hep cat named Sal pointed this out to me today, and I must admit the resemblance is a tad uncanny:

The CW Network logo
Allah

While I'm not usually inclined to buy into conspiracy theories, I do offer this in support of the theory. You've been warned.

Screw you, high bidder!

2008-08-10T20:02:00.003-05:00

All week I've been watching an auction on eBay for this original Burma Shave sign:

It was at $10 until this evening. With a few hours to go, it jumped up to $35. I sat on it until the last 39 seconds, and ended up getting out bidded at $65.

Fuck, I really wanted that. It's been a while since I caught the auction fever, so now I'm all riled up. I guess I'll have to make due with the knowledge that the asshole who got it ended up paying a lot more because of me.

Mosaic meme

2008-08-07T20:33:00.008-05:00

Oh, and it's click-o-riffic!

So, I found this on Mycalls blog, and thought it would be fun. Of course, he has a nice actual mosaic showing on his page. Me, I just don't feel like joining Flikr today. So my meme, you gots to click the link to see the picture. Here's the rules:
1. Type your answer to each of the questions below the mosaic into Flickr Search.
2. Using only the first page of results, pick an image.
3. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into mosaic maker.

1. What is your first name? Christopher,
2. What is your favourite food? "What? Oh, not much, hanging out, eating some pizza...",
3. What school did you go to? Salmacis,
4.What is your favourite colour? water droplets in the shower - o.k. bokeh,
5.Who is your celebrity crush? Come for the celebrities,
6.Favourite drink? Mmmm, there's more in here....,
7.Dream vacation? Reminder to Self: Slow Down on the Caffeine,
8.Favourite dessert? angry CIA killer,
9.What you want to be when you grow up? The Snuff Film,
10.What do you love most in life? An old Killarney home,
11.One Word to describe you? DEEP SEA HARDHAT DIVER #8 "NO EINSTEIN ON THE BEACH",
12.Your nickname? The Power of Blood (2nd in a series)

My answers? (highlight)
1. Christopher
2. Pizza
3. Mount Ida
4. Blue
5. Katee Sackoff
6. Sam Adams
7. Tropical island
8. Tapioca
9. Content
10. Kerry
11. Eclectic
12. Schultzy

Sweet smelly tongue goodness!

2008-08-05T20:14:00.001-05:00

So, yeah... HAPPY DAY!! Tickets went on sale today for The resident's Bunny Boy show at Foxboro.

Tickets have been purchased, and we'll be soaking up some eyeball goodness on October 12th.

Woohoo!!

You, sir, are a true vulgarian

2008-08-04T19:46:00.000-05:00

And I salute you.

Open post to the drop ins:

2008-08-02T20:41:00.001-05:00

Sorry, guys. I have no information about Wall E stuffed animals. If there are any, I'd like one.

Interracial fellatio?

2008-07-23T19:27:00.003-05:00

In the fron lobby of our building, they have a handy map. I never really took note of it until today, when I noticed the following:

The room that corresponds to the rather dirty looking pictogram is the gym. I don't know, but that looks like one hell of a work out.

Holy shit

2008-07-17T20:25:00.000-05:00

Have I mentioned how fucking AWESOME this looks?

New digs

2008-07-14T20:26:00.002-05:00

Today I was relocated to a new cube. While I've enjoyed being tucked away in relative seclusion, I did have to share my cube. Not any more.

Here's a shot of my former habitat. There was a bit of a buzz since my move was sudden this morning, and a lot of folks thought I had quit.
No such luck. Instead, I set up shop in the front of the office. While I'll be more exposed, there are a number of bonuses. First, it's my cube. No sharing. second, I'm getting a privacy screen to protect the sensitive information I spend all day manipulating. I suppose it'll also protect unwitting office drones from the occasional goatse or 2 girls 1 cup.
Double plus good: My snarky motivational poster is highly visible.
For those of you without super zoom glasses, it reads "Teamwork: A bunch of harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction."

Woohoo, Mr. Koch

2008-07-14T19:24:00.004-05:00

Boston Beer Works is now the biggest US owned brewer of beer in America.

I salute you, good sir. And your delicious product.

Wall E

2008-07-12T19:55:00.003-05:00

So today I took TKJr to see Wall E. Partly because I thought it would be fun to do something, just the two of us. And, partly because I really wanted to see it.

What a great movie. Most of the reviews I had read were right on the mark. Beautiful to look at, touching and lots of fun. The complaints over the depiction of humans: unmerited. I felt that humans were shown as victims themselves, and displayed an almost immediate desire to live as shown as the option was available.

I really, really enjoyed it. Pixar usually does a great job, and this is hands down their most stunning achievement. Go see it.

It's going to be a steamer!

2008-07-07T21:23:00.002-05:00

I was just taking a peak at the 5 day forecast, and it don't look to good. 90's and humid mostly. Anything over 80and I'm way out of my comfort zone.

To make matters worse, the thing that is on my mind this week is... winter! Thinking about heating oil and wood burning stoves. It makes me sick that I need to buy oil now, before it's over the $6 per gallon mark this winter.

It's shit like this that makes good people go bad. Or whiney people whine more.

The delicate sound of thunder

2008-07-04T20:09:00.004-05:00

Thanks to I-Mockery's post on the art of firecracker labels for the pic.

I'm sitting at the computer tonight listening to the sound of amateur ordinance all around us. Abington canceled their fireworks display, so I'm guessing we'll have more than the usual backyard pyrotechnics tonight.

As usual, I'm not overly inclined to stand and gawk, oohing and ahhing at the sparkles. Fireworks really don't do anything for me.

I do, however, ruminate about the poor pricks who live or have lived in war zones. For too many, the same sounds I ignore tonight would be the signal to get in the basement. Duck and cover. There's nothing festive about bullets and mortars, that's for sure.

I'm very pleased I live in a country that has not had a war on it's soil for many, many a year. It's not something I wish to experience. Barring the complete collapse of civilization ( a distinct possibility, mind you), I don't expect to have to suffer that in my lifetime. And for that, I am thankful.

So, happy birthday, America. For better or worse you shuffled off the oppression of Great Britain to claim your independence. So that you could go on to crush many more people and countries with that very same oppression. Well done, and thank you for keeping your killing out of my backyard.

I'm ready for my reach around

2008-07-02T21:30:00.003-05:00

In order to help fill the state coffers, Massachusetts just put into effect an additional $1 per pack cigarette tax. So, add to the $4 a gallon of gas, now I have to spend $7 a day to feed my addiction.
Fuck you, Massachusetts. Sure, I'm the dumb pecker who continues to smoke despite the obvious health risk. I'm weak willed enough not to be able to easily conquer a minor addiction. But that's not the point. All I'm saying here is stop bleeding me dry, yo.

In other news, it took me two hours to get home today. Woohoo! The best part is I get to share the road with assholes like this:

Stoked!

2008-06-29T22:19:00.003-05:00

From the horse's mouth:

New album due for release first of September.
Brand new material from the most eccentric band in the world!

With THE BUNNY BOY, The Residents have created another off beat pop gem. A sonic roller coaster in the style of Duck Stab, The Commercial Album and Demons Dance Alone, the album features 19 fast paced songs. Obsession, insanity and the coming Apocalypse have never sounded better. The THE BUNNY BOY'S release will be accompanied by a world tour and a narrative internet series.

Track Listing/Features:

* Boxes of Armageddon
* Rabbit Habit
* I'm Not Crazy
* Pictures from a Little Girl
* What If It's True?
* Fever Dreams
* Butcher Shop
* I Like Black
* Secret Room
* My Nigerian Friend
* It Was Me
* Golden Guy
* The Bunny Boy
* Blood on the Bunny
* I Killed Him
* The Dark Man
* Secret Message
* Patmos
* Black Behind

Exactly what I was hoping for!

Friday

2008-06-27T19:46:00.003-05:00

This afternoon at work we got a pretty decent thunderstorm. There were at least 2 lightening strikes close enough to set off car alarms. Here's a shot of the sky as I was leaving work and the storm had passed:
There was some flooding due to the downpour. Turning to my car, I saw the traffic that awaited me on the lower deck.
Here I am 15 minutes later, not even 1/8 of a mile from my former parking space.
Thirty minutes after leaving work, I was just getting on to the Zakim. Don't know if you can see the two staties in front of me:
They were escorting a box truck that was being towed by a flatbed tow truck. The box truck was not ON the flatbed. It was being pulled behind by a chain and cable.

WTF?

A little over 2 hours later, I was home. The weekend begins.

Ominous skies

2008-06-24T21:11:00.003-05:00

For a few moments there, I thought we were going to get a whopper. No dice. It rained pretty heavy for a few minutes, and then rumbled away.

The highlight of the day was coming out of the O'Neil tunnel to black skies, tons of lightning streaking down, and "Lucinda" blaring on the stereo.

Good night, funny man

2008-06-23T08:21:00.003-05:00

"Atheism is a non-prophet organization."

"Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. "

"Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday."

"If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed."

Breakfasts past

2008-06-22T20:00:00.002-05:00

If there's one thing that I love, it's breakfast cereals. Here are 3 of my all time faves:

Remember when...

2008-06-19T08:38:00.001-05:00

Personal responsibility and parental guidance meant something?
Those were the days.