Saturday, January 28, 2006

Kung hei fat choi

The year of the dog begins. Ever since TKJr started going to a Cantonese daycare, we've adopted Chinese New Year as a holiday in our household. The last 2 fell on a week day, so KG and I actually got to take a day off from work. But, just like our own holidays this year, it fell on a weekend.
We did observe the new tradition, though. TKJr went out for the day, and KG and I spent the entire day cleaning. The apartment looks nice. I went to the big K for storage bins tonight, so I'll resume packing up the spare room tomorrow.

I spent the better part of last week being more or less sick. I seem to be over the worst of it, but have developed a tickle in my throat which is making me cough like crazy. Nice.

But... on a positive note, I picked up my first box of Commit today. I've tried the patch. That worked for a while, but didn't help break the habit. I figure I have a better shot with the lozenge. My plan is to start off alternating between butts and lozenges, slowly working my way to all lozenge. Then cut down and quit from there.

I've enjoyed being a smoker. It has become a big part of my life. But enough is enough, and I'm ready to give it up. Not entirely happy mind you, but ready none the less. I would like to be one of those people that keep a pack in a tin in the garage, only indulging on rare occasions. So far, that has not been the case. I'm a pack and a half a day or nothing. So now I'm shooting for nothing.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006


Expecting father's go through it to. I suppose it has to something to do with the genetic make up of men. Fixing things, assembling furniture, building... it's something simple and concrete. I'm no exception.

2 bookcases assembled and in place. 22 decorative storage boxes for media assembled and in place. 1 huge ugly bookcase, a busted up cd rack and a very ugly video cabinet empty and ready to go out the door.

Not too shabby. Of course, the litter boxes need to be cleaned, the spare room is far from empty and the rug needs vacuuming. I'm getting there. Slowly.

Monday, January 23, 2006

What's Up With that?

This is the second time it has happened, so I thought it worth commenting.

Today was one of those messy, wintery New England days. Freezing temps overnight, we wake up to snow. The storm had been forcast. Firefox was giving me severe weather alerts last night. So, I get up this morning, clean the cars off, and prepare for a long, painful commute.

Getting out of Weymouth was bad. The back roads were slick, and cars were all over the place. Slow going. I hit the highway, and.... nothing. Almost no cars on the road. I had no traffic at all until I hit the South Bay Center! My ride home... record time, little over 30 minutes!

Last time a big storm was forecast (which we never got), there was no traffic. I had a great ride in.

So my question is this: All you people who could afford to stay home today because the weather might be bad: Maybe you should take some time to re-examine your priorities? I don't know about anyone else, but snow or no snow, I had to be at work today. If you have a job where you can not go in because the weather is shitty, maybe you shouldn't go in at all. How about staying home on the nice days so those of us slobs who have to drive to our jobs can do so. I can see no logical reason at all for a 25 mile commute to take 60-90 minutes every friggin day. Then, when we get a snow storm, I'm at work in 40 minutes. That's with bad driving conditions.

Seriously. Stay the fuck home. Find another way into work. Do every day what you did today. And let me go where I need to go in a reasonable amount of time.

Thank you. That is all.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

I hate the mat

Pretty uneventful weekend here at la casa de Schultz. TKJr spent the weekend at my mother-in-laws. I spent most of Saturday clearing out the spare, soon to be baby's, room. Still a long way from being done, but I threw out a lot of shit and packed many a rubbermaid box. I'll need to go buy some more containers so I can get back at it this weekend.

KG and I went to dinner and rented 40 Year Old Virgin. Pretty funny, I enjoyed it. Today I spent the day at the laundromat. I hate doing laundry on Sundays, as the place is always packed. Saturdays are better, but I had other things going on. Besides, I thought I wouldn't need to go today.

We have a laundry room in our apartment. It has a hook up for a washing machine. It also has a 220 line for a dryer, and a vent hose already connected. We have a washer in the basement, but no dryer. We had been planning on buying one, since KG doesn't like me spending 3 hours out of the house on the weekend cleaning clothes. She has accused me of enjoying it, but I really don't.

So, we stopped at a local dealer to check out dryers. The prices were good, and I anticipated purchasing one and having it delivered this weekend. No more mat! A salesman comes over, and starts asking questions.

Out of nowhere, KG pulls this shit about not wanting the dryer upstairs, in our freaking apartment. Currently the laundry room houses 3 litter boxes. As I try to patiently explain to my suddenly illogical wife that the only 220 line in the basement is on the upstairs neighbors electricity and that there is no vent, she starts giving me this shit about not wanting it upstairs, and that I never told her any of this.

I did...a number of times over the past 4 months.

So, I calmly said, "Fine, we're not buying a dryer. Let's go."

She's been rather irrational about the whole thing. She refuses to believe I ever said anything to her about not being able to put it in the basment (I did.) She insists I never said anything about putting it inside our apartment (where it belongs, and I did.) She states she doesn't want to take one of the litter boxes out of the laundry room (although putting one somewhere else in the apartment would help stop one of the cats from pissing everywhere.) She says she doesn't want to dry our clothes in the same room as the litter boxes.

I can't win this one. I love KG very, very much. I honestly do. But seriously... fuck her. I spent $15 and 3+ hours today when I could have been home, doing small, manageable loads and getting other things done around the house.

Whatever. Tomorrow night, I'm going to IKEA to buy some new bookshelves and boxes for all our CDs. I'm looking forward to that.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

The number on the engine was 44

I really love it when management gets a bug up the ass over something. Some companies have an easy button. All we have is a panic button.

Every few days I take a peek at a little report called Data Export . There are 14 different error reports in there, and I am responsible for resolving 2 of them. That's what I've been doing all along.

Well, a new year has started, and apparently the big thing at the moment is to drop all our RAPs for 2005. I don't even know what the fuck a RAP is. Well... not entirely true. Basically, Medicare pays us half up front, and the other half when a patient is discharged. So, to get the RAP to drop, the patient has to be properly discharged.

The other 12 reports are the responsibility of other departments. Not today. Suddenly it's my fucking problem.

The worst part... I can't actually fix anything. All I can do is annoy people by emailing them and telling them what to do. That's what I did. All day. After wasting a whole day and not catching up with my work, I had managed to look at and comment on 30 some patients. Didn't get to do my real work. In the end, I was told management really only wanted to know what was going on, and if anything could be done. What?? I spent my whole day on this! And where were they when I finished? Having a meeting with a catered meal.

Fuck all y'all. Seriously.

But hey, that's what they pay me for.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

I wasn't discounted!

Harking back to my days at Equifuck... we had a customer service initiative going on. One of the points they tried to drive into our heads was "don't discount the customer." The analogy was pretty much : treat the customer like shit and you're putting him on the 99 cent rack. I don't know why that stuck with me. But it did.

Anyhow... I had a total of 4 customer service interactions today. As of late, I've really developed a loathing when it comes to shopping. Stupid, poorly trained and slow witted clerks. Apathetic sales people. Understocked, understaffed and overcrowded.

First off was the redemption center. I loaded my car with 580 empty beer and soda bottles. Any time I have to redeem bottles I go to Quincy. The place there, you pile your bottles on the counter, they count them and pay you. No cleaning, sorting or clear bags needed. Today was pleasant, as usual.

Next off was a trip to the most vile of department stores. Fucking Wal*Mart. How I hate fucking Wal*Mart. I bought a Sharpie, some AA batteries, trash bags, and a cool mist humidifier for TKJr. I decided to buy an extra filter, since that usually ends up being a problem later on down the line. So there I am, in the humidifier aisle, vainly searching for extra filters. An associate hurries by me, I pay him no mind. Suddenly, the guy stops, asks if he can help me, and then walks me 2 aisles over to where all the filters are. He finds the right one for the model I have in hand, looked to see if there were anymore, then showed me a spot on the top shelf where he stashed back ups. He instructed me to ask for him in the future if I was in the store seeking a replacement filter.

I was flabbergasted. It was like the Wal*Mart of lore... friendly, helpful service! But it didn't stop there. The cashier was friendly and conversational without being annoying. She was quick. She offered me a large bag for the humidifier. After I was rung up, she held my bag while I picked up the humidifier, then handed me the bag with a smile. Damn!

Next was Dunkins, drive thru. Nothing special, but still pleasant. After that I popped into Building #19 to look for tuxes. No go, so I didn't actually transact while I was there. That said, as I walked toward the exit, I caught a whiff of the worst shit stink death fart I've ever run across. It made my eyes water. Guess I'll have to go to the Garmet District for my monkey suit.

At this point, I was so taken back by my overly pleasant shopping experiences (shit smell aside) that I was contemplating quitting my job so I could shop during the day more often. In hopes of regrounding myself, I darted over to the McDonald's drive thru for a quick lunch. The McD's in Weymouth sucks, and is almost always a painful experience. I was certain that would end this run of happy shiny customer service.

Well, nothing to write home about. No one offered to blow me or anything, but it was quick and I got what I ordered. So I went home.

And that was my day.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Pasties and a G String

TKJr managed to catch himself a cold. He had a fever of 102.2 tonight and a runny nose. It's 11:18PM and he's already woken up 3 times.

I had been considering a mental health day tomorrow. At the moment, it looks like it may be a Mr. Mom day instead. Oh well.

I should probably go hit the sack now. That'd be the wise thing to do. But I haven't trolled eBay yet today...

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Follow Up

So... in spite of management's decision to postpone closing, I closed. That was my goal, and I achieved it. As usual.

I trooped at a birthday party for a 2 year old today. He was very happy to see a real live "pooper" (stormtrooper). It was fun. TKJr and KG tagged along, so it was fun for the whole family.

I just switched out the dvd player in the living room with he one in the bedroom. The older one in the bedroom doesn't have issues with the interactive games on the Thomas and Friends dvd. So, hopefully there won't be anymore "Come on, damn it" coming from my 2 year old. That said, while sitting on the toilet last night he did say "God damn it, Moe!" Funny thing is, Moe wasn't anywhere near us!

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Close this

So, it's been a stressful week here at work. Both JCAHO and DPH showed up to do audits. The net result of this has been management running around in a state of near panic. Top that off with the fact that it's closing this week, and you've got no fun.

I have been, as usual, busting my hump to get us closed. I'm down to 9 patients. SW has 127 still. I have heard from a number of people now that closing has been postponed. No one has formally told me.

Why, I ask? I suspect it has been intentional. To keep me working on it.

Fuck all y'all. That's all I'm saying on that subject.

On the lighter side, I'm trooping at a birthday party this weekend. One lone TK and a bunch of toddlers. Should be fun!

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Fred's Chair

I never dared to call him Fred when he was alive. Not to his face, anyway. It was always Grampa.

It's been, what..., 13 years since he died? I still miss him.

After all this time, my grandmother is finally getting new furniture for her living room. She had decided to part with my grandfather's beloved easy chair. We affectionally called it the "Archie Bunker Chair." Not because Grampa was an Archie, but because no one sat in his chair. It was his throne.

Tonight, it has come to rest in my living room. I'm sitting in it now as I blog. Grampa's chair becomes Daddy's chair. My ass has found a new home.

Gimmee that ole time religion

I'm not an overly religious guy. Not by any means.

Be that as it may, my entire personal history is deeply infused and emeshed in Christianity. I'm the son of a preacher man. I had no choice in the matter.

These days, I hold to an anuual tradition. Every Easter, I sit down and give Jesus Christ Superstar a good, hard listen. It's my way of observing. I try to make a point of listening to it on Good Friday if at all possible.

Well, I'm adding something to the list, starting this year. Now I'll also be watching Wormwood .

Cuz the Good Book is full of stories. And some of them are real wacky.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Whitey's Lament

French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
Acorns popcorn shit.
Acorns popcorn shit.

Not so common on the Common
to see a squirrel of white.
Today I gave a nurse named Whalen
a creeping kind of fright.

French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
French fried french fries
Acorns popcorn
Acorns popcorn shit.
Acorns popcorn shit.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Sugar melts and goes away...

Plane crashes are something else. I'm watching Seconds from Disaster . Tonight's episode is about the Concord crash. So, you need a wheel to blow out, a piece of rubber to strike the landing wheel bay. Sever a cable, which causes sparks. Add the fact that there happens to be a fuel leak. Presto... plane goes boom!
I watched the one on TWA flight 800 last week. Simply mind boggling the string of coincidence involved in bringing that sucker down. Amazing.
Cat crashes, on the other hand, are a simpler affair. Sneak up behind two snoozing cats and shout. Watch them slam right into each other as they run like hell.
I meant to write car crashes, but cat crashes looks funny. Anyway, car crashes. All you need for one of those is an asshole, and we got those aplenty!